My Big Plan

I've always been a very ambitious person.

I know that to get what I want I have to try very hard but deep down I know that no matter how long it takes, I'll get there. Journalism is one of the toughest areas of work to get into, but I have no doubt in my mind that one day I'll be the editor of a top magazine.

Since leaving university, many people have asked me why I've not thought about setting up my own magazine. The truth is, I have. A lot. But I've always dismissed the idea. Why would I set up my own magazine when I can get a job working for Cosmopolitan, Company or More! magazine? Why would I waste so much money on something that probably wouldn't be successful? I mean, it's so hard. I know first hand how much effort goes into a magazine, I could never do that. For starters I really don't know much about current affairs and although I keep somewhat up to date on the life of celebrities, I couldn't give a monkeys arse about how Tulisa's leaked sex tape taught us more about her blow job skills then we'd like to know. Sure, it's interesting ish. But it doesn't really effect me, does it? So why would I care? Secondly, I really don't know much about InDesign or creating my own website or even printing costs. I simply wouldn't be able to do it.

Except as I've received job rejection after job rejection (well, actually, just silence since no one bothers to get back to you unless you've gotten the job), I've indulged in the idea. Suddenly I'm thinking what if I set up my own magazine? What if I get off my bum and learn the skills I need to do it? Who cares if I'm not interested in celebrities, from what I've heard most women would like to read about real inspiring women anyway. And yknow what? I bet other editors have been in my position too. Everyone has to start somewhere. I'm starting here.

This might be my only blog regarding this issue for a long, long time. Or I might be blogging with more progress next week. But I've decided, it's happening. My general plan is to get myself onto a course that will teach me Indesign or website design. Then my blog will turn into either a website and then a magazine, or just straight into a magazine. Or I'll even publish my magazine online. Who knows.

I do know however that I'll be blogging along the way. I have NO idea where to start and I bet YOU might be someone in my position too, reading this as soon as I publish this post or even in five years time. I bet you might want to set up your own magazine too, but don't know where to start. Overwhelmed with how much you need to research? Worried about how exactly this is going to fit in with you making a living? Wishing you had someone you could ask EVERYTHING to, or just a definitive guide that includes even the smallest issues like er is it acceptable to flirt with any good looking men you have to interview? Yeah, me too, I hear you sister.

This is my account from the very beginning, from the moment I've decided its going to happen to the very moment it does.

Taking Chances

So I'm wide awake at 3am with so many things on my mind and so many things to write about. I figured this would be the best place to post my current ramblings ;)

So far, 2012 is looking to be an amazing year. I said I'd make changes and I did. I saw the year in by celebrating in the best way possible, and since then I've kept so positive that I can't even remember the last time I was genuinely unhappy. I decided to put myself and my happiness first this year (which to be honest I decide to try and do every year anyway) and so far so good! I also decided to take a leaf out of 17 year old Louise's book and give this whole 'saying yes to everything/taking chances' thing a go. The last time I did this was in 2007 and I recently read an old blog that I ran during this year and quite clearly it was one of the best years of my life. I had an amazing social life, I finally had the hang of dating boys (my god the stuff I got up to!) and just generally had fun. So that's what I'm doing again this year.

I celebrated NYE in Paris. I visited Sunderland again last month. I tried paintballing the weekend before last, and the week after next I'm starting snowboarding lessons. I've been out with old friends I haven't seen in ages and going out with new friends too. I've cut the ex pretty much completely out of my life (although he still continues to leave me anonymous blog comments?) and I'm dating again which is a lot of fun! I don't have a job yet but I am still looking. I've lost weight too, which I'm extremely pleased about and I've still got loads more of 2012 to look forward to. 

I'm really pleased at the way things are going right now. I know it won't be long until something comes along and fucks everything up BUT I've definitely learnt that life is what you make of it. By taking chances and saying yes to things you wouldn't normally, you open your life up to so many great opportunities. Pushing myself out of my comfort zone is definitely my 'thing' of 2012 and I've found that even if I don't have a great time (which so far I always have luckily), I'm still happy to have at least taken the chance to try it so it's a win-win situation. 

Here's to taking chances :)

Visiting Sunderland

Back in February I visited Sunderland which is where I studied at university for three years. This was the first time going back since July last year and also the first time seeing two of my close uni friends for so long. We'd discussed making the trip for months beforehand, I hadn't seen my friend Jo for over a year as she'd taken a gap year in France, and I hadn't seen my other friend Becky since graduation. We made sure to coincide our visit with the towns biggest pub crawls, going on pub crawls being some of our favourite memories from being students.

Becky is originally from London so we both got the same coach up, me hopping on at Milton Keynes. We immediately launched into gossip about men, as usual. After a long six hour coach ride we arrived in Sunderland and I cannot tell you how weird it felt to be back.

I had some of the best years of my life in this town. My student days had their ups and downs but it was definitely an experience. Upon graduating I pretty much had come to hate the town. It was only when I stepped foot off that coach that I realized that in fact I missed it more than I had ever imagined.

The pub crawl was amazing. We felt a bit old in that it was mostly filled with 18 year old freshers but it was still so much fun. It was so good going to all the bars I used to drink in, dancing to all the songs I remember from being a fresher myself and just generally having a good time. The theme was nurses and doctors and I think we customized our outfits well - I even made my own paper hat!

Argile refers to someone I've been texting/was texting at the time (in all honesty I'm not quite sure what's going on, I don't think we're talking at the moment after he accidently offended my downstairs ha) and it was one of those nights where you just knew something was going to happen as we'd been talking constantly and were both out that night. I used to work with him but obviously nothing ever happened because I was with my ex when I worked with him. Anyway my friend knew we were texting and insisted on writing this on the back of my t-shirt! Myself and 'Argile' later ended up making out for about two hours straight, ha.

This is me and Jo in the amazing hot dog joint they had in one of the clubs. I was absolutely amazed at this fact.

I am all class...

Me and Jo eating ice cream..this is really just to prove that I didn't go up there and just spend the whole time getting drunk!

And finally the state of Jo's room by the last day!

All in all it was one of the best weekends ever. It was so nice seeing the girls and having a catch up. Even though we talk all the time it was just a nice change to have some food, watch a movie and just spend actual time with them in person. I bumped into my ex whilst there as well and this made me feel really weird, which I hadn't expected to have felt. I pretty much spent the last half of last year going through the motions with him - from being together to breaking up, missing each other, hating each other, arguing constantly and finally to nothing. It was so weird seeing him in person for the first time in so long as well. The last time I saw him was before I moved down south, we both cried and hugged each other, saying 'I love you'. Then when I saw him again it was like we were strangers! I always knew it would be weird though but I was glad I had the chance to say hello. It wouldn't of felt right going back up to Sunderland where he was once such a significant part of my life and not seeing him.

Me and the girls usually do the St Paddy's Day pub crawl for Becky's birthday as well but as we're all skint I think we're giving that one a miss this year and going to Amsterdam next month instead. Besides, I'm hoping we go up again for the Halloween pub crawl!

Oh and of course I can't not mention some of the hilarious quotes/inside jokes from the weekend -

'Pre menstural singletons'!

'Fit as chips!'

'Pick up my stethoscope - now'!

The 'single man in a club' pose!

Becky nicking some of some poor blokes beer which he left with us for safe keeping

The random loner in the hot dog joint that sat with us in deep conversation for a good half an hour

Jo deciding she no longer likes 'Dedication to my ex' after hearing the real version of the song

Green liptstick

'Do me..I'm not a slug btw!'

Poor Dumbo getting sweet and sour sauce on his hat!

Other than Paris, this weekend has also been one of my favourite weekends of 2012 :)

A chic weekend away in Paris, darling!

As mentioned in my last post, I was recently living it up in Paris. Myself and my sister went for three days/two nights and I fell in love with the place. The sights were amazing, the atmosphere was exciting and their lifestyle and culture is so different. In France everyone is so, so sophisticated! Swapping sweaty clubs for delicious French cuisine and glam bars and eating so much food but still staying so thin is definitely something I could get used to.

Anyway, here's what we got up to!

The first thing that amazed me about Paris is how thin everyone is! I know it's a common assumption that everyone in France is thin anyway but I had no idea how true this would be. Hand on heart I only saw one larger lady whilst being there for three whole days (and we visited a LOT of Paris) and I'm not even sure she was French anyway! It must be all the smoking! Also, people in France really do love baguettes. I spotted so many people walking around just munching on their baguette, or a baguette just randomly sticking out of their handbags. I don't blame them though, they were lush! The second thing amazed me as we travelled to our hotel is that in France they sometimes use double decker trains. I found this amazing. Why can't London have double decker trains?!

On the first day we visited Notre Dame de Paris. Notre Dame, based in the gothic quarter of Paris is so beautiful. It's stunning and I really loved how gothic it was. It looked almost scary with the various gargoyles and stone statues. I saw one statue in the entrance of a lady standing on a squished man?! Notre Dame has such a rich history as well and there was no way we could visit France and not go here. We did go inside but none of the photos I took came out particularly well as we were not allowed to use flash photography. We did make sure to light a candle for our Papa Roy though :)

The beautiful Christmas tree just outside of Notre Dame, we were lucky to go just after Christmas as all the decorations were still up!

We spent NYE at Champs-Élyées (also known as The Avenue des Champs-Élyées) which is a really famous avenue leading up to the Arc de Triomphe. Before that we also went to this super expensive restaurant for dinner which was, wait for it, SIX COURSES! We only managed to eat five courses though I don't even know how! Anyway, for events like NYE, Champs-Élyées is THE place to be. It runs for 1.91 km and on NYE the whole avenue is packed with crowds celebrating the new year. It is also popular because it is host to various cinemas, cafés, luxury speciality shops, clubs and restaurants (it is one of the most expensive strips of real estate in the world!). Champs-Élyées to France is like Leicester Square in London - it's where everybody goes to celebrate NYE.

Myself and my sister at Champs-Élyées, and the photo above showing some of the decorations that run along the famous avenue. In France it is tradition to exclaim 'Bonne Année' which translates to 'Good Year' when the clock strikes 12!

After this we got chatted up by a few randomers who discovered we were English and then we were, as usual (yes it happens on a regular basis to us) stalked! I am partly to blame for this because I was eyeing up some bloke at the Arc de Triomphe (as we walked along the avenue and up to it). But I wasn't eyeing him up, he just looked like a spitting image of one of my ex's friends only chubbier so for a split second I thought it was him! Anyway we left and found a metro station which is when they began chatting us up, asking us to go out with them, asking us for kisses etc. We told them we had boyfriends and then one asked us for a 'baguette kiss' whatever that is, whilst the other claimed that having a boyfriend doesn't count as we were in another country! Then they tried to bribe us to come to their market stall the following day to give us free makeup? In the end they followed us to the Arc de Triomphe ALL THE WAY BACK TO THE METRO STOP OUTSIDE OF OUR HOTEL. All this way! Me and my sister ALWAYS attract the weirdos!

The following day we briefly visited the famous Moulin Rouge. What I didn't know (which should have been really obvious) was that it was based basically in France's red light district among sex shops, sex shows and places like that! I was surprised to find how different it was then how I expected it to be from the film. I thought it would be much more glam and I definitely thought it would be tucked away somewhere, not sticking out in the middle of a street filled with dodgy shops! Nonetheless you can still see why it's considered to be so famous, inside it still seems very glam and the shows look amazing.

After that we visited Monmarte which is a 130 meters high famous hill in Paris. The street leading up to the hill is very popular in that it is the host to many nightclubs and restaurants. It is the main street towards the hill and was very crowded as we walked up. I'll just note as well that this area is apparently well known for pick pockets so we made sure to keep our belongings in small bags - we wore the straps across our chests so they could not be grabbed and wore these underneath our coats to be extra safe.

At the very top there is a church (Basilique due Sacré-Coeur) and from the top you can see a spectacular sight of the city. Along the climb there are also usually various artists performing such as buskers and mime artists (not typical mime artists but the people that are painted white all over and pretend to be statues, I'm not sure of their proper names!).  

A carousel at the bottom of the hill with Basilique due Sacré-Coeur in the background.

The view from the top

When we got to the top we found that there was a Christmas fayre still running so we got some delicious mulled wine and hot chocolate (seriously, the best in the world!) before going inside Basilique due Sacré-Coeur.

The next day, as you can see, we visited The Eiffel Tower! 

We waited in the end for about four hours to get to the top. We had wanted to go up in the evening and the long wait was horrible but it was worth it. We only actually stayed up the top for about 5 minutes and had to queue to get back down as well (I know you're all wondering why we bothered if we only stayed up there for 5 mins!) but I'm really glad we did. The view was one in a million, it was hand on heart absolutely astounding and made the wait more than worth it. The reason we didn't stay longer was because it was raining very heavily and it was extremely windy, I was worried the wind would blow the camera out of my hands!

This was taken from the second floor.

View from the very top. Sorry these photos aren't very good quality!

Then we went back to the gothic quarter near Notre Dame where they had all these cute slender backstreets which were filled with different places to eat and drink. Below is a photo of one of the streets, it doesn't do it justice. This area reminded me of The Shambles in York.

We ate in a cute Italian restaurant where we stuffed our faces yet again.

The ceiling of the restaurant.

The restaurant had notes from all different currencies hanging up and people had signed them which I thought was cool!

The Notre Dame at night.

The following day we were pretty exhausted and after checking out of the hotel we only had a couple of hours before checking our train. So we ended up in a posher part of Paris where we had a nosey around the shops and visited another pretty church before heading back.

We had the most amazing time ever and I'll never forget it!

The anti-climax that is New Years Eve

In my last post I explained how I spent last NYE in a club, with my boyfriend at the time, sober. This isn't strictly true. Last NYE was the worst NYE of my life. I had spent Christmas down south with my family and after much thought, decided to come up north to spend it with my boyfriend at the time who is a DJ.

My constant need for what I claim is a 'glam' NYE stems from the fact that when I was younger my parents left me - sulking - at my grandparents when it was the millennium. My whole family went out to parties and I was severely disappointed that not only was I having a boring NYE but it was an extra kick in the teeth because it was the millennium! Something I'd never experience again in my lifetime! Never mind the fact that I was 12 and couldn't really go to any 'party' anyway! Anyway, after that I dreamed about amazing ways to spend NYE.

So I was pretty disappointed last year when I spent £60 on a 5 hour coach ride to spend just one night in the north east to have a great new years and it turned out to be disastrous. After that I swore I'd never get excited about NYE again as it was always an anti-climax. I expected to be spending this NYE just gone by stuffing my face at the all you can eat chinese with my parents then going home, watching the countdown on TV then going to bed. Hardcore.

Instead I got my perfect New Years Eve this year. It was the most amazing NYE of my life and I'll never forget it. On NYE this year I found myself getting up bright an early at 6:00am to travel to the city of Paris where I spent three days with my sister over the new year. We began seeing in the evening by managing 5 courses out of a 6 course dinner in a very nice restaurant! After that it was time to make our way to where we were celebrating the countdown. We almost didn't make it, exiting the metro with only 10 minutes to spare and immediately becoming lost in a crowd of excited people, eager to get out and celebrate the new year. However we made it there with literally two minutes to spare and awed in amazement at the atmosphere at Champes-Élyées - the go to place when it comes to celebrating NYE.

Celebrating NYE at Champes-Élyées was the most awesome, amazing thing I have ever done and I will never forget it. The pure atmosphere was breath taking and it was so pretty as well. I honestly could not have wished for a better way to celebrate the beginning of 2012. 

Goodbye 2011, Hello 2012!

With the start of 2012, we are again faced with the idea of new possibilities. A new year brings hope for a better start and the excitement of taking new chances. Nothing can beat that magical feeling as the clock strikes 12 and we all feel that bubble of excitement deep inside us. We think about what the new year will bring and we reflect about what we have experienced and learnt in the previous year. We hope the following year will be better, but we accept and appreciate what has happened in the last year.

2011 was a big year for me and brought many, many changes. I started 2011 by celebrating the countdown with my boyfriend at the time in an empty club, sober. I was living up north with my boyfriend and my landlord, attending university, working part time in a bar. I celebrated the end of 2011 and the start of 2012 in Paris with my sister, and I am now single, living at home again with my parents down south and I am a jobless graduate. A lot has changed!

There were a lot of highlights - and downsides - last year. Celebrating my two year anniversary with my ex boyfriend with a weekend away in York was amazing. Breaking up less than a month later was tough. Later. I took an internship at More! Magazine which is one of the top leading women's lifestyle magazines in the country - this was an amazing opportunity and will forever look great on my C.V!The first half of the year I was under a lot of pressure, constantly working on my dissertation and trying to work out my feelings as me and my ex continued to see each other whilst trying to move on from each other. July brought about the biggest highlight of the year with me graduating! I was extremely proud of myself and to this day I still can't believe I managed it. However becoming a graduate invited a lot of change which led me to saying goodbye to my life up north. I moved out of my shared house and out of the north east to back home again with my parents. I also said goodbye for good to my ex boyfriend and whatever relationship we had at the time. We both promised to make the effort to see each other again but now we are no longer a part of each others lives. I came home and signed up to job seekers, only to find a temporary job less then a week later. For the rest of the year I got my head down and concentrated on work. The last few months of 2011 flew by. Just before Christmas my temporary contract ended and I found myself jobless again. So, in total, 2011 was a year filled with ups and downs.

New Years Eve was a massive high point for me as I spent it in Paris with my sister! I had the most amazing time ever and celebrating the count down at the Champs-Élysées was the perfect way to see in 2012. The atmosphere was amazing and not only was it a far cry from my last new years celebrations, but it was the best new years eve I've had yet. It really got me optimistic for the following year.

So now is the time to look ahead. I know that every year I draw up lists of resolutions that I never keep and I vow to make the year amazing only for it to normally be average. I have made a few vague resolutions, but if anything I am being more optimistic. I know life has its ups and downs and that even the bad times mean something. It's impossible for 2012 to be perfect without something going wrong, but the important thing is to make the times that go right extra special. I'm definitely looking forward to what it may bring so I say bring it 2012!